Clueless

So we’re just 4 sleeps away from our test day. This cycle has been very different from cycle 1. When we started, neither of us were looking forward to it and we both felt quite negative about possible outcomes after the roller coaster of disappointment last time.

Over the course of the cycle we have both grown in positivity and hope. Again though, it’s been quite a roller coaster; having 9 eggs collected, then 7 mature ones, 4 fertilising and then only 2 embryos left at day 3, the dwindling numbers are pretty unnerving.

Today I’m 8dp3dt (which means in non IVF folk terms, 8 days past a 3 day transfer) Hopefully by now the embies (or at least one of them) will have “hatched” (yes, thats a real thing) and implanted in the endometrium to continue their growth.

Most natural pregnancies are only discovered when a period is late, so most women aren’t aware of whats going on after fertilisation. For IVF couples, this is a luxury we don’t have! We know exactly what our embryo should be doing! This is torturous.

During this two week wait, most women (but not all) will have a variety of symptoms. So far I’ve had cramps, sore, enlarged boobs, nightmares, sex dreams, constipation, fatigue, nausea, hot flushes, night sweats, mood swings, hunger and cravings, loss of appetite, wind and bloating.

The trouble with these symptoms is most of them are caused by the hormone we have to take post embryo transfer, progesterone. This lovely hormone can make you feel like the dreaded period is on its way one minute, then certainly pregnant the next. It is a total head fuck! Google is not helpful in this instance. Especially in an emotional state at 3am….

Lots of women decide to test prior to OTD (official test date) but I will stick to Saturday, as tempting as it is to pee on a stick before then! I want to hold on to our embies and our dream as long as I can, and get a definite result. I really do feel full of hope, love and positivity this time. I just hope I’m right. I really do.

Thanks for reading,

Nic

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8 thoughts on “Clueless

  1. So sorry to see your news X your blog is an inspiration and has helped me as I start an IVF cycle. It can be a cruel world …. Much respect for your decision. Start to love life and focuss on your next journey xx

    Liked by 1 person

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